Altay Pulak
January 11, 1989 ~ January 4, 2020
Born in:
College Station, Texas
Resided in:
College Station, Texas
Altay Pulak, age 30, passed away in Texas, on January 4, 2020. He was born on January 11, 1989 in College Station, Texas, to Sema Pulak and Cemal Pulak.
After junior college, Altay followed his great passion for music and studied digital audio editing and recording in Austin where he also learned sound engineering and composition. During his final three years, he delved into the world of cryptocurrency and block chain technology, for he believed in the coming age of a world where everything would be decentralized. This new passion galvanized him to develop a skill set in financial innovation, distributed ledger technology, economics, marketing, sales and research. His comprehensive and diverse interest in this field allowed him to begin networking with individuals interested in supplementing these new technologies in businesses. Thus, he gained experience with leadership in teaching investors how block chains work and aiding them in planning basic business models and strategies in this new space through seminars that he offered in Las Vegas and later in College Station.
Despite his great interest in the financial world, Altay’s true passion remained to be music till the very end of his journey here. He played the piano throughout his life but also enjoyed learning and performing with cello during his middle school years. He started playing the piano before his kindergarten years during which he gave outstanding recitals. Altay’s skill as a pianist reached its peak in his late teens when he mastered Chopin’s and Rachmaninoff’s most challenging compositions. He himself composed beautiful pieces some of which were selected from among thousands of others and played on radio in Europe. His tribute to his beloved paternal aunt was a glorious piece that he composed the night of her passing, 25 days prior to his own departure from this world.
Altay was not only very gifted in music but was also a remarkably creative artist. He started drawing as a very young boy and amazed his loved ones with his exceptional creations. His detailed realistic drawings as a child later became symbolic and at times surrealistic creations, which left the viewers in awe of his unusual talent.
Altay was a beautiful and generous soul with a brilliant mind, a remarkable intellectual capacity, a great sense of humor, and many artistic and musical talents, along with an endless interest in the spiritual world. He will be sorely missed… He is survived by his parents, Sema and Cemal Pulak; his maternal aunt and uncle Fezal and Ilker Gulfidan; his maternal cousins Esra, Asli and Eren Gulfidan. He also leaves behind his paternal uncles Can Pulak with aunt Seyda and cousins Can, Alidoruk and Aysenaz; Cenan Pulak with aunt Hronn and cousins Kenan and Selma; his great aunt and uncle Ayla and Emin Turan and second cousins Berfu and Burak Turan; his paternal second cousins Gonul and Fatih Gençer; his uncle Yildirim Mit. He is preceded in death by his beloved paternal aunt Dilek Mit.
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Letter to my Altay
My precious Altay, my beautiful son,
I remember the incredibly joyous moment when they placed you on my bosom seconds after your delivery. Your gorgeous dark eyes looked at me with great curiosity, but hidden behind that unforgettable look was great wisdom. Well, my sweet baby, that intellectual curiosity never stopped nor did your wisdom ever cease to grow. How could I forget any of the moments we had together… I miss your sweet embrace, your loving good night kisses, your wonderful laughter… I miss your magnificent piano recitals… I miss listening to your glorious compositions through your best headphones you would place on my ears with that cute smile… I miss the way you would present me your splendid drawings for me to admire… I long for the great conversations we used to have when your amazing intellect would shine through. Yes, there is so much I miss, yet I find solace in my firm belief that you are in a far better place governed with indescribable love and great knowledge. I know deep in my heart that someday we will be reunited in this place of peace as described in the poem below. Know that I will always love you and carry you in my heart. – Your Loving Mom
His Journey
By Ellen Brenneman
Don’t think of him as gone away
his journey’s just begun,
life holds so many facets
this earth is only one.
Just think of him as resting
from the sorrows and the tears
in a place of warmth and comfort
where there are no days and years.
Think how he must be wishing
that we could know today
how nothing but our sadness
can really pass away.
And think of him as living
in the hearts of those he touched…
for nothing loved is ever lost
and he was loved so much.
~
WIDENING CIRCLES
I live my life in widening circles
that reach out across the world.
I may not complete this last one
but I will give myself to it.
I circle around God, around the
primordial tower.
I’ve been circling for thousands of
years
and I still don’t know: am I a
falcon,
a storm, or a great song?
Rainer Maria Rilke (1875 – 1926)
Teyzeciğin Fezal & Seni çok seven İlker Amcan
What a beautiful tribute to your remarkable son!
Thank you for sharing him with those who never had the fortune of being in his special presence.
Please accept my deepest sympathy.
Dear Sema,
I am so touched by the beautiful things I’ve learned about Altay. He has a special place in my heart as a wonderful caretaker of my beautiful Alex Angel in his younger years.
I pray these wonderful memories will help you each day find comfort.
Peace and love,
Margaret
Altoşum,
En son konuştuğumuzda bana hayatın doğmak, işe gidip gelmek ve ölmekten ibaret olmadığını söylemiştin. Haklıydın. Her zaman hayatta bir derinlik aradın. Sıradan şeyler yapmak istemedin ve yapmadın. Resimlerinde, bestelerinde, yazılarında ve konuşmalarında bu arayışı sürdürdün ve etrafindakilere sıradışılığını gösterdin. Mektuplarını okurken her zaman birçok hayat yaşamış ve birçok şey görmüş, yaşından çok daha olgun, akıllı, ve duygulu biri olduğunu anlardım.
Aramızdan ayrılalı neredeyse 1 yıl olduğuna inanmak güç. Bir gün bile seni düşünmeden geçmiyor. Bu dünyadan ayrılman bizim icin çok zamansızdı. Ama belki de senin için daha güzel bir dünyada yeniden doğmanın zamanıydı, ve o senin gibi saf, temiz, özgür, doğru, ve iyi niyetli yerde daha mutlusun. Rahatça konuşabildiğin ve seni kolayca anlayabilen varlıkların yanındasın. İleri görüşlü bir yol gösterici ve aydınlatıcı bir lider rolündesin. Ve yukarıdan hepimizin üzerine parlayan, yolumuzu aydınlatan, karanlığa düştügümüzde bizi o derin bilinmezlikten çıkaran ışıksın. Buna eminim. Seni çok seven ve özleyen kuzenin ve kardeşin, Eren.
Altos’um.. tatli Altos’um benim…
Evet, belki bu website birinci firsat olmustur bana, kafamin icerisindeki karmakarisik dusunceleri, hisleri toparlayip yaziya dokebilmek icin. Oysa bu surec boyunca ne cok konustum seninle …
Uzun senelerdir gorusemememiz bir engel olmadi hic bir zaman bize ve gercekten hic uzak kalmadik birbirimize. Keske daha cok gorsem canim Altay’imi, kardesimi, daha cok paylassam onunla yasadiklarimi demisimdir hep … ozellikle son yillarda, ama senin varligini hep hissettim yaninda.
Daha kucucukken birlikte bizim evde ve anneannemlerde gecirdigimiz zamanlar, muzikle ilgini ilk konusmalarimiz, ortak sevdigimiz gruplar, bana merakla sordugun onca soru.. sonra senin yavas yavas bizimle ve arkadaslarimizla cikmaya baslaman.. Istanbul turlarimiz.. ne ara buyumustun… ne ara buyumustuk …
Ozellikle muzik ve sanatla ilgili yaptiklarin, ruhunun aynasi oldu Altay’im.. o ince, narin, duygu dolu ve sanatci yanini ortaya cikardi tamamen. Her yaptiginla gurur duydum ve her seni sevindiren haberle de mutlu oldum. Hem de cok mutlu! Senin icin hep herseyin en iyisi olsun istedim.
Eminim ki su an oyle. Biliyorum, bazi seyleri geri getirmek imkansiz ama bugun oldugun yerde daha iyi ve daha mutlu olduguna inaniyorum. Inanmak istiyorum. Cunku sen bunu hak ediyorsun.
Hala icimde sana karsi olan bir koruma hissi var. Sen ne kadar buyusen de.. yanimda olmasan da… abla kardes iliskisi… o hic gecmeyecek bir his benim icin. Ve sana son bir kez sarilamamanin uzuntusu cok guclu… ama sen benim seni ne kadar cok sevdigimi hissediyorsun, bundan eminim.
Gittigin (ama aslinda hic gitmedin) haberini aldiktan yalnizca birkac gun sonra kucuk bir bebek dogdu kucagimiza… adi Leonardo. Benim bebegim .. ailemizin bebegi .. senin kardesin. Senin gibi kara kara gözlü, derin bakisli, siyah sacli, sevimli.. miniminnacik .. onu dogururken bile sen aklimdaydin Altos’um.
Sevdiklerimiz hic gitmezler. Akillarda, kalplerde, tum guzelliklerle, tum kokularla, tum notalarla yasarlar.. bazen cok konusmaya da gerek yoktur, gozler, bakislar yeter bir insani tanimaya. Sen bakislarinla bana hep cok sey anlattin, kendini cok iyi anlattin.
Sen bir tanesin. Benim tatli Altay’imsin.
Ablan, Esra
(SOAD forever)
Altay my dear friend,
I have so much joy and love for having experienced your presence and humor in this life.
I miss your light and passion for everything good in this world, it was truly an inspiration in my life.
Bitcoin hit 23k today and the rest of our predictions came true as well in that regard; (literally all of them).
I know we’d be jumping for joy and buying unnecessary musical gear to celebrate.
I miss sharing things like that with you buddy, as dumb as material things seem right now.
True freedom can’t be bound in a form such as ours for very long. Enjoy the fruits of your work here, my friend.
Love you brother.
Altay will always be one of my greatest, closest friends. His infectious energy and love would light up a room and draw people towards him. Always one to entertain and make the most out of any situation, he embraced life at every turn. I was fortunate to meet Altay in high school, and spent many years thereafter as his friend. I’ll always remember the gleam in his eye and his positive attitude. He truly changed my life for the better and I will always cherish the long days we spent together. Altay I love you and I miss you so much.
My first impression of Altay was his brilliant mind, intellectual curiosity, and remarkable creativity, but perhaps more importantly his gentle and kind demeanor. During our conversations on mutual interests, he always first listened carefully and expressed his opinions very articulately. I often thought how successful Altay would be as a lawyer or a salesman with his unusual ability to persuade others. During our occasional debates, he always treated me with utmost respect and never crossed the line. At the end of our conversations, I would invariably feel like an older and wiser friend to him, yet I would also be delighted that I had a very special young friend I could learn from.
My profound sympathy for your loss. He clearly was a remarkable and gifted young man. person.
To all that reads:
I met Altay through a mutual friend that worked in the same building as me. I didn’t know Altay until one day he gave me a book about Bitcoin and introduced me to cryptocurrencies. I thought he was kind of crazy at first, but little did I know that he would one day become my best friend, my mentor, and an older brother. When I first met Altay, I was in a depressive stage of my life; however, something about Altay’s energy changed me for the better. He would always reach for the stars, talk about endless possibilities, and really give a transparent view on life. I was really lost in life but Altay taught me the importance of who I am as a person and helped me understand my place in this grand universe. His teachings and guidance resonated within me and gave me clarity of who I was as a person. I will miss him very much, but this isn’t goodbye because I’m sure I will see him in another life.
To Altay:
Hey bro. Been thinking about you a lot. I’m sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye, but this isn’t a goodbye. Until next time, I’m sure that I’ll see you again. I just wanted to say thanks for all that you did. Thank you for opening my eyes of endless possibilities. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for making me laugh. Thank you for all the back-pops. Thank you for giving me knowledge. Thank you for giving me hope. Thank you for your wisdom. Thank you for sharing yourself as a person. Above all, thank you for being my brother. Until next time.
P.S.
Price of Bitcoin is $28,171.58. You were right.
Love and Hugs,
Jun Lee
My profound sympathy to your loss of this remarkable and talented young man.
Most sincerely,
Bill , your upstairs Ankara neighbor (1966-7)
Altay’s love for life was contagious. His smile was brighter than the sun and his laughter brought happiness to everyone who was blessed enough to hear it. Altay was an amazing person, a creative soul, and a unique individual. Through countless memories he lives on in all of us smiling, laughing, and joking. I miss you dearly my friend. May you find peace on the other side.
I still pray for you – I know the year doesn’t really dull the pain, but I pray that you have been able to smile at his memory more these days.
I recall the beautiful setting where he rests and hope the daily beauty of the flowers and plants have cheered your heart over the long months.
May you feel the blessings of God Almighty –
Catherine
Dear Sema,
Your son was so blessed to have been “loaned” to you for his short time on this earth. You were devoted and always eager to express to me your love for him. He was specially chosen to have you and Cemal as parents. Although we cannot understand why, we do know the final answer for those who love God. We will be with Him in paradise. I thank God for you and for this son you loved so well. I hope to hear him play music when I get to heaven — and I’ll be dancing with you there as well.
Much love,
Sue Ellen Davis
You and your family are in my heart and mind. I am deeply saddened by the news of your loss. Please accept my warmest condolences.
Love and hugs,
Ansam J. Talib
I will never forget how you described your angel to me.. I had formed a clear picture in my mind, although I had never met him. An angel on earth and now an angel in heaven, continuing his journey…
Thinking of you with much love,
Sophia
Altay was living DECADES ahead of the rest of us, always exploring and pushing the boundaries of what he knew… Not only was he an active student of life, but he was a patient teacher as well.
It was impossible NOT to learn something new everytime I saw him. Yet, for somebody so intelligent, he constantly stayed so curious about life. He had this great openness about him that allowed me to feel extremely comfortable in his presence, and (regardless of how comparatively naive I was) I always felt a sense of freedom that I’ve found with few others to completely be myself with him.
I’d always tell him that he was an alien and laugh at the way he would do or say something so completely off the wall! He had the most ridiculously absurd sense of humor that I’ve ever witnessed! He was so sharp and quick-witted–I repeatedly joked about how badly I wished I had a soundboard of “the shit Altay says”.
Time never failed to fly by when we were together, it was something that both of us always recognized. We would usually sit together just talking for hours… about EVERYthing. No topic was off the table. It’s entirely accurate for me to say that Altay was one of the only people who I felt that I could talk to about ANYthing… simply because I never felt judged by him (…even when he would try to make fun of me for something!). I always told him, “I really appreciate your honesty,” because him and I could always be truly ungaurded with each other. and I cannot expres how much I appreciated that about him. In a world that puts on so many fronts, it was an extremely refreshing quality that quickly caused me to regard him as one of my best friends.
He truly loved his friends SO much. That is one of the most obvious traits about Altay. Nearly every action he took was in some way or another linked to his insatiable desire for sharing experiences with his friends.
I know how greatly and DEEPY Altay loved both both of his parents as well; he would often brag about each of their accomplishments and good character. At any mention of his mom & dad, he would just roll his eyes and shake his head rather than attempt to muster up any words that could describe his fondness for them.
I love this soul so very much..
A great part of me feels lost in being forced to go forward without his persepctive and his input in my life. Altay was one of my best friends, and with him being such a unique and transcendent individual, it ony makes sense that none of our lives will be the same without him in it.
I hope his family will take comfort in the fact that Altay’s life has affected so many human hearts in such a meaningful & unforgettable way. I know that my life will never be the same after meeting Altay and I hope to honor him by never ending my own pursuit for knowledge and a fascination with life. I wish his family the best, and a richly fulfilling future.
Thank you for bringing Altay to us. With all my heart.
Sevgili Altay,
Ben Fatih Gençer’im.. Anne dedelerinden RebiiGençer’in yeğeni.. Sen de onun torunusun.. Yani kanbağı olan akrabanım. Anadolu’da bu tarz akrabalara dayı da deniliyor. Ne acıdır ki sağlığında karşılaşma imkanımız olamadı. Ve yakın akraba olmanın muhabbetini yaşayamadık. Şimdi, senin anı defterine bunları karalarken çok müteessirim.
Sevgili Altay, ne mutlu sana ki, kısa hayatına çok şey sığdırmışsın. Çok yaşayıp, boşuna yaşayanlardan olmamışsın..
Biliyorum ki, Anneciğin ve babacığın büyük acılar içindeler. Belki de, sevenlerinin mesajları onları daha da hüzünlendirecek. Ama ALTAY PULAK’ın ebeveyinleri olmanın da gururunu yaşayacaklar.
Işıklar içinde uyu sevgili yeğenim.. Dayın FatihGENÇER
04.01.2021/ANKARA-TÜRKİYE
Sema,
I never got to meet Altay but it is clear what an amazing young man he was. You are an example to us all on how to love others well, as your love for your sweet son is so abundantly clear. You and your family continue to be in my thoughts and prayers as you deal with this devastating lost. Sending you love and hugs, my sweet friend.
~Katie
Canım Altoş’um, bir tanecik kuzenim, sen gideli tam bir sene oldu ve ben buna hala alışamadım ve alışamayacağım. İnanır mısın seni düşünmediğim bir gün olmadı… bu hayat seni bizden çok erken ve zamansız bir şekilde aldı.
Seni çok uzun zamandır görememiştim, sarılamamıştım, yüz yüze konuşamamıştım, bunların özlemi hep içimde kalacak. Sen her zaman iyilik ve sevgi dolu, o tatlı cocuksu gulusunle insanin icini ısıtan ve bir o kadar da yaratıcı bir insan oldun. Her ne kadar uzak olsak bile müziğe ve resime olan ilginin ve kabiliyetinin yaratıcılığının bir göstergesi, kendini bir şekilde anlatmanın yolu olduğunu gördüm. Ben seni bu şekilde hatırlayacağım.
Daha yapacak ve yaşayacak çok şeyin vardı…Bazen hayatta neden aramak bir işe yaramıyor çünkü bir cevabı olmuyor. Giden çok özleniyor bunu bil. Senin hep kalbimde ve aklımda olacağıni, ordan hiç çıkmayacağını ve seni her düşündüğümde yüzümde bir tebessüm olacağını unutma.
Senin gibi güzel ve özel bir kuzenimin olması bana verilmiş en güzel hediye. Ege’cigin seni tanima sansi olmadi ama emin ol ki ben ona seni hep anlatacagim. Seni çok özleyeceğim ve tek dilegim gittigin yerde huzurlu ve mutlu olman. Biliyorum sen bir şekilde bizimle beraber olacaksın ve bize isik sacmaya devam edeceksin.
Seni cok seven kuzenin, ablan Asli
Şu sılanın ufak tefek yolları
Ağrıdan sızıdan tutmaz elleri
Tepeden tırnağa şiir gülleri
Yiğidim aslanım burda yatıyor
Bugün efkarlıyım açmasın güller
Yiğidimden kara haber verdiler
Demirden döşeği taştan sedirler
Yiğidim aslanım burda yatıyor
Canim Altaycim bu ayrilik Cok zamansiz oldu, hala bana seslenisin kulagimda ,ablam demen! Ruhun bizimle Ben bunu biliyorum. Emanetin “Annecigin,annemdir,son nefesime kadar asla onu yanliz birakmayacagim. Seni Cok seviyoruz
Huzurla uyu!
Sema,
I continue to pray that you will be comforted by God’s love as you travel this long journey of grief. Although I never got to meet Altay, I know he was a special soul and wonderful son to you. I know you will cherish every memory of your time with him.
With much love,
Tanya
With deep love and sorrow
Seni hic tanimadim annenle tanistik. Ama acin icimizi yakti. Sema ablacigim Rabbim emanetini yanina aldi kavusma gunune kadar onu cennet bahcelerinde dolandiracak ins. Ne guzel bir evlat yetistirmissin. Arkasinda sevgi birakmis, herkes ondan sevgiyle bahsetmis. Nurlar icinde uyusun. Inaniyorum ki onun ruhu gelip seni öpüp oksuyordur ama biz goremiyoruz.
Dear Sema and Cemal,
What a beautiful life you two created for this world and eternity beyond! I look forward to meeting Altay, to seeing his big wondrous smile and hearing him laugh.
Love is coming to you from an old pal, Sue Katzev of Yassi Ada days
It has been a year since you left us and I hope you are in a comfortable and peaceful place. Altayciğim, I miss your smile, your humor, your laughter and your handsome face with those beautiful dark eyes. You were a magnificent piano player and a true artist. You had many talents that other people wish they had. Your parents brought you up in style. You were always thoughtful, polite and well mannered.
I remember the last time you came by yourself to visit us for a week. We went to the Washington car show and you sat in the driver’s seat of all the cars you adored. You were excited and in the meantime you lost your new camera in one of those seats. We went back and forth and traced the cars you visited and still couldn’t find your camera. My family and I will always cherish the time we had together with you. You left us too early and suddenly, and you will always be in our hearts. You were a wonderful son and a true blessing to your parents.
Your loving uncle,
Cenan Pulak
I only met your beloved son a few times
But was amazed at his intellect, however knowing his fabulous mom I can understand.
I remember how surprised he was seeing my R2D2 project and I will always treasure the big Star Wars book he gave me.
I sincerely hope time will heal the deep wound you have suffered, though I know it will never be healed complely.
Know that I will be here for you until it is my time to join altay.
The times we have shared are precious to me and share your deep loving grief.
Canim oglum, aramizdan ayrilali tam 1 yil oldu ama Benden hic gitmedin ,seni annenle tanidim. Elimden gelen Birsey olsada o Melek yuzlu Berrak Annenin kalbini ferahlatabilsem, Annen Bizim Cok kiymetlimiz kendi canimdan gibi , keske onu hergun gorebilme imkanim olsa , Onun kalbinin guzelligini hergun gorebilsem. O Benim melegim bana Allahin hediyesi , emanetin Bizde Sen rahat uyu guzel oglum. Annenin hayatinda olmak Onun can arkadasi olmak Benim icin bir Onur.. Gidisin bizleri Cok uzdu , her an seninle yasiyor annecigin. Seni hergun 5 Kere her namaz da duani okuyorum. Sana orada Annemin yardim ettigininde duyumunu aldik , Annen harika ablana sahip cikti , Annemde sana cikmis ,harika ablan ilk seni o Ruyasinda gordu. Ekremcik Senin hediyelerin legolarinla oynuyor seni anarak yapiyor. Cok ilginc Birsey oldu , Harika ablana 2 hAfta once hic acmadigi oyuncak sepetinde olan Telefonu sarj etti acti sadece bir tarif almak icin , icinde kart olmadigi halde senden Mesaj geldi , harika ablan saatlerce kendine gelmedi . Dun seni ziyarete geldim kalbimizi Cok derinden yaraladin altayim. Annen orada kugu gibi saliniyordu seni ciceklerle konusuyordu , kelebek gibi ucuyordu , ama kanatsizdi. Anneciginin ici kan agliyor Altayim. Seni Tanimadan sevdim. Huzurla uyu ,Mekanin Cennet olsun
Altos’um.. tatli Altos’um benim…
Belki bu website bir ilk firsat olmustur bana, sana soylemek istediklerimi soyleyebilmek ve kafamin icerisindeki karmakarisik dusunceleri, hisleri toparlayip yaziya dokebilmek icin.
Uzun senelerdir gorusemememiz bir engel olmadi hic bir zaman bize ve gercekten hic uzak kalmadik birbirimize. Tabii, keske daha cok gorsem canim Altay’imi, kardesimi, ve daha cok paylassak onunla yasadiklarimizi dedigim olmustur … ozellikle son yillarda, ama senin varligini hep hissettim yaninda.
Daha kucucukken birlikte bizim evde ve anneannemlerde gecirdigimiz zamanlar, muzikle ilgini ilk konusmalarimiz, ortak sevdigimiz gruplar, bana merakla sordugun onca soru.. sonra senin yavas yavas bizimle ve arkadaslarimizla cikmaya baslaman.. Istanbul turlarimiz.. ne ara buyumustun… ne ara buyumustuk …
Yillar hizla gecmis ve bizler buyumus olabilirdik ama icimde sana karsi olan o duygu hep kaldi. Abla kardes iliskisi… o hic gecmeyecek bir his benim icin.
Sana son bir kez sarilamamanin uzuntusu cok guclu… ama sen benim seni ne kadar cok sevdigimi hissediyorsun, bundan eminim.
Her yaptiginla gurur duydum ve her seni sevindiren haberle de mutlu oldum. Hem de cok mutlu! Ozellikle muzik ve sanatla ilgili yaptiklarin, ruhunun aynasi oldu Altay’im.. o ince, narin, duygu dolu ve sanatci yanini ortaya cikardi tamamen.
Senin icin hep herseyin en iyisi olsun istedim. Bugun oldugun yerde daha iyi ve daha mutlu olduguna inanmak istiyorum. Cunku sen bunu hak ediyorsun.
Gittigin (ama aslinda hic gitmedin) haberini aldiktan yalnizca birkac gun sonra kucuk bir bebek dogdu kucagimiza… adi Leonardo. Benim bebegim .. ailemizin bebegi .. senin kardesin .. senin gibi kara kara gözlü, derin bakisli, siyah sacli, sevimli.. miniminnacik .. onu dogururken bile sen aklimdaydin Altos’um.
Sevdiklerimiz hic gitmezler. Akillarda, kalplerde, tum guzelliklerle, tum kokularla, tum notalarla yasarlar.. bazen cok konusmaya da gerek yoktur, gozler, bakislar yeter bir insani tanimaya. Sen bakislarinla bana hep cok sey anlattin, kendini cok iyi anlattin. Sen bir tanesin. Benim tatli Altay’imsin.
Ablan, Esra
Altos’um.. tatli Altos’um benim…
Evet, belki bu website bir ilk firsat olmustur bana, sana soylemek istediklerimi soyleyebilmek ve kafamin icerisindeki karmakarisik dusunceleri, hisleri toparlayip yaziya dokebilmek icin.
Uzun senelerdir gorusemememiz bir engel olmadi hic bir zaman bize ve gercekten hic uzak kalmadik birbirimize. Tabii, keske daha cok gorsem canim Altay’imi, kardesimi, ve daha cok paylassak onunla yasadiklarimizi dedigim olmustur … ozellikle son yillarda, ama senin varligini hep hissettim yaninda.
Daha kucucukken birlikte bizim evde ve anneannemlerde gecirdigimiz zamanlar, muzikle ilgini ilk konusmalarimiz, ortak sevdigimiz gruplar, bana merakla sordugun onca soru.. sonra senin yavas yavas bizimle ve arkadaslarimizla cikmaya baslaman.. Istanbul turlarimiz.. ne ara buyumustun… ne ara buyumustuk …
Yillar hizla gecmis ve bizler buyumus olabilirdik ama icimde sana karsi olan o duygu hep kaldi. Abla kardes iliskisi… o hic gecmeyecek bir his benim icin.
Sana son bir kez sarilamamanin uzuntusu cok guclu… ama sen benim seni ne kadar cok sevdigimi hissediyorsun, bundan eminim.
Her yaptiginla gurur duydum ve her seni sevindiren haberle de mutlu oldum. Hem de cok mutlu! Ozellikle muzik ve sanatla ilgili yaptiklarin, ruhunun aynasi oldu Altay’im.. o ince, narin, duygu dolu ve sanatci yanini ortaya cikardi tamamen.
Senin icin hep herseyin en iyisi olsun istedim. Bugun oldugun yerde daha iyi ve daha mutlu olduguna inanmak istiyorum. Cunku sen bunu hak ediyorsun.
Gittigin (ama aslinda hic gitmedin) haberini aldiktan yalnizca birkac gun sonra kucuk bir bebek dogdu kucagimiza… adi Leonardo. Benim bebegim .. ailemizin bebegi .. senin kardesin .. senin gibi kara kara gözlü, derin bakisli, siyah sacli, sevimli.. miniminnacik .. onu dogururken bile sen aklimdaydin Altos’um.
Sevdiklerimiz hic gitmezler. Akillarda, kalplerde, tum guzelliklerle, tum kokularla, tum notalarla yasarlar.. bazen cok konusmaya da gerek yoktur, gozler, bakislar yeter bir insani tanimaya. Sen bakislarinla bana hep cok sey anlattin, kendini cok iyi anlattin. Sen bir tanesin. Benim tatli Altay’imsin.
Ablan, Esra
Altos’um.. tatli Altos’um benim…
Belki bu website bir ilk firsat olmustur bana, sana soylemek istediklerimi soyleyebilmek ve kafamin icerisindeki karmakarisik dusunceleri, hisleri toparlayip yaziya dokebilmek icin.
Uzun senelerdir gorusemememiz bir engel olmadi hic bir zaman bize ve gercekten hic uzak kalmadik birbirimize. Tabii, keske daha cok gorsem canim Altay’imi, kardesimi, ve daha cok paylassak onunla yasadiklarimizi dedigim olmustur … ozellikle son yillarda, ama senin varligini hep hissettim yaninda.
Daha kucucukken birlikte bizim evde ve anneannemlerde gecirdigimiz zamanlar, muzikle ilgini ilk konusmalarimiz, ortak sevdigimiz gruplar, bana merakla sordugun onca soru.. sonra senin yavas yavas bizimle ve arkadaslarimizla cikmaya baslaman.. Istanbul turlarimiz.. ne ara buyumustun… ne ara buyumustuk …
Yillar hizla gecmis ve bizler buyumus olabilirdik ama icimde sana karsi olan o duygu hep kaldi. Abla kardes iliskisi… o hic gecmeyecek bir his benim icin.
Sana son bir kez sarilamamanin uzuntusu cok guclu… ama sen benim seni ne kadar cok sevdigimi hissediyorsun, bundan eminim.
Her yaptiginla gurur duydum ve her seni sevindiren haberle de mutlu oldum. Hem de cok mutlu! Ozellikle muzik ve sanatla ilgili yaptiklarin, ruhunun aynasi oldu Altay’im.. o ince, narin, duygu dolu ve sanatci yanini ortaya cikardi tamamen.
Senin icin hep herseyin en iyisi olsun istedim. Bugun oldugun yerde daha iyi ve daha mutlu olduguna inanmak istiyorum. Cunku sen bunu hak ediyorsun.
Gittigin (ama aslinda hic gitmedin) haberini aldiktan yalnizca birkac gun sonra kucuk bir bebek dogdu kucagimiza… adi Leonardo. Benim bebegim .. ailemizin bebegi .. senin kardesin .. senin gibi kara kara gözlü, derin bakisli, siyah sacli, sevimli.. miniminnacik .. onu dogururken bile sen aklimdaydin Altos’um.
Sevdiklerimiz hic gitmezler. Akillarda, kalplerde, tum guzelliklerle, tum kokularla, tum notalarla yasarlar.. bazen cok konusmaya da gerek yoktur, gozler, bakislar yeter bir insani tanimaya. Sen bakislarinla bana hep cok sey anlattin, kendini cok iyi anlattin. Sen bir tanesin. Benim tatli Altay’imsin.
Ablan, Esra
We enjoyed watching Altay grow up through the years. He was especially nice to our oldest grandson who loved to go to Altay’s to play when he visited us.
Dear Sema,
I returned to this incredibly moving tribute video after Margaret said it was on the site. I am overwhelmed by Altay’s talent. His music , the drawings , his incredible smile and your joy with him. I am filled with emotions after listening and viewing all of the pictures from birth to later in his short but accomplished life. What an amazing person with a smile that lit up the room in these priceless pictures. Thank you for sharing him with all–even those like me who never had the chance to meet this extraordinary talented young man. Heartfelt sympathy to you and all those in the family and the many friends in this tribute video.
Altay’cığımız dünyamıza erken ve zamansız veda etti.Oysa amcası olarak onunla daha uzun ve güzel günler geçirecek,birlikte Marmaris’te tatil yapacaktık.Kısmet olmadı,anıları,hatıraları ve piyanosunun tuşlarından çıkan o muhteşem müziği ve besteleriyle yaşıyacağız artık.Kıymetli anne ve babası Sema’cığımıza,Cemal’ciğimize sabır ve başsağlığı dileklerimizi tekrarlıyoruz.İnanıyoruz ki, sevgili yeğenimiz cennet mekanında huzur ve ışıklar içinde uyuyor,melekler ona yoldaşlık ediyor.Ruhu şadolsun .Şeyda-Can Pulak
Altay’cığımız dünyamıza erken ve zamansız veda etti.Oysa amcası olarak onunla daha uzun ve güzel günler geçirecek,birlikte Marmaris’te tatil yapacaktık.Kısmet olmadı,anıları,hatıraları ve piyanosunun tuşlarından çıkan o muhteşem müziği ve besteleriyle yaşıyacağız artık.Kıymetli anne ve babası Sema’cığımıza,Cemal’ciğimize sabır ve başsağlığı dileklerimizi tekrarlıyoruz.İnanıyoruz ki, sevgili yeğenimiz cennet mekanında huzur ve ışıklar içinde uyuyor,melekler ona yoldaşlık ediyor.Ruhu şadolsun .Şeyda-Can Pulak
Hayatimdaki en degerli varligim, biricik, guzel, canim oglum, Altay’im benim,
Yarin 11 Ocak ve senin 32’ci dogum gunun. 10 Ocak, 1989 aksami bana artik bu dunyayi gormek icin hazir oldugunun ilk isaretlerini verdin. Babaciginla onceden hazirladigimiz esyalarimizi toplayip apartmanimizin kapisina yoneldik. Ben duraklayip son bir defa iceri baktim cunku dondugumuzde artik bu evde uc kisi olacaktik. Ne mutluluk verici bir histi o. Ertesi sabah 7:20 civarinda College Station Medical Center hastahanesinde dogarak bizi inanilmaz bir sevince bogdun. Anneanneciginin ilk erkek torunu, babaanneciginin de ilk torunuydun. Bizim de hep biricik yavrumuz oldun.
Teksas’ta dogmana ragmen Turklugunu hic unutmadin, canim Altay’im, ve seninle hep Tukce konusmamizi istedin. Istanbul, Izmir, ve Bodrum’daki yakinlarimizla yasadigin mutlu gunleri, doganin guzelliklerini hep sevgiyle ve ozlemle anardin. Islerini bitirince oralara donup ailemizle yine unutulmaz gunler gecirmeyi tasarlamistin ama bu dilegini yerine getiremedin. Ne yazik ki cok sevdigin Turkiye’ye tekrar donemeden aramizdan ayrildin. Acimizin derinliginin tarifi yok, canim oglum. Evimizdeki piyano’ya bile bakamiyorum; esyalarin geri geldigi gibi odanda duruyor. “Bir mucize olsa da Altayimiz geri gelse, yine bizi sarip sarmalasa, bize o sanatkar parmaklariyla piyano calsa, cizdigi muhtesem resimleri gosterse, o muthis zekasiyla ve bilgisiyle sevdigi konular hakkinda konusup bizi aydinlatsa” desek de olmuyor. Seni geri getiremiyoruz, Altayim.
Belki fiziken yanimizda degilsin ama o yuksek ruhunu yanimda hissettigim anlar cok oldu. Benimle kontak kurmaya calistigin her ani biliyorum. En yakin zamanda vefat yazini bitirdikten sonra goz yaslariyla yatagimin kenarina dayandigim sirada benim uzuntumu hissedip yine geldin ve beni arkamdan sarmaladin. Saskinlik icinde dondugumde kimseyi goremedim. Kedimiz icerde uyuyordu ve zaten o olamazdi. Senin yanimda oldugundan emindim ve sevinc goz yaslari icinde orada oylesine kaldim.
Biricik yavrum, neden boyle zamansiz baska bir boyuta gittigini bilmem mumkun degil ama inandigim birsey varsa birgun obur dunyada tekrar sana kavusup sonsuz sevgimle seni kucaklayacagim. O sevgi dolu, adil, ve guzel dunyada nurlar icinde ve mutlu ol, canim Altayim, bu dunyadaki en degerli varligim benim.
~ Seni sonsuz seven annecigin ~
Thank you for coming into my life. I only knew you for eight months, but that was more than enough time for you to completely revolutionize my life.
I had been going to school for five years in Texas A&M and in the midst of senioritis you were such were a breath of fresh air, full of forward thinking insight, decades ahead of the time we lived in. Exactly what I needed at the time, yet not what I was expecting to find at Half Price Books, amongst the endless piles of Harry Potter books.
A year since you’ve been gone has passed and today we arrive to what would of been your 31st birthday.
After the impact you’ve had on my life, I thought it best to celebrate your life and write to you on your birthday, in honor and celebration of the life you lived.
It was an honor to watch you be an inspiration to so many you encountered, whether in brief moments or as a long time friend. I deeply admired how you shared your views unapologetically, passionately. Yet, were so patient and kind while listening to others.
I can’t help but wonder if you knew early on why you were here. Your were dutiful in making sure you could help as many as you could when they crossed your path.
I hope it brings your soul happinees and joy to know the guidance you offered me has sent my life in a brighter direction, and it continues to resonate in my life, even today. It has helped me blossom into a better person. I will this cherish forever.
But that is not were you end.
You were also so kind. You paid attention to detail. You remembered stories. The little things. The parts that mattered.
You were charismatic, charming even.
You knew jokes and told them well. You genuinely enjoyed making people smile and laugh. I can still hear you singing from time to time.
You were always so welcoming and cared about ensuring everyone felt at home in your presence. A truly generous soul.
You had vision for the future. You were prophetic. After a year of you being gone I am still watching many of your predictions come true.
You were brilliant. You could talk in depth about so many concepts, and bring them together like a seamless melody.
And your musical talent should not go unspoken for. I still listen to your songs from time to time, escaping into the multi-layered beats crafted in your tracks. I miss you playing the piano.
You were truly gifted, a genius of your own kind. May your indigo soul rest in it’s violet flame and finally rest in peace.
I wish I’d met you sooner, but I am so grateful that in such short time you managed to squeeze in teaching me about the grand universality of it all, and how important it is to not loose sight of how fun and magical life can be.
…”We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when” ….
In the meantime, may you finally be free. In full flight.
Much love
️️
II:II
111
Thank you for coming into my life. I only knew you for eight months, but that was more than enough time for you to completely revolutionize my life.
I had been going to school for five years in Texas A&M and in the midst of senioritis you were such were a breath of fresh air, full of forward thinking insight, decades ahead of the time we lived in. Exactly what I needed at the time, yet not what I was expecting to find at Half Price Books, amongst the endless piles of Harry Potter books.
A year since you’ve been gone has passed and today we arrive to what would of been your 31st birthday.
After the impact you’ve had on my life, I thought it best to celebrate your life and write to you on your birthday, in honor and celebration of the life you lived.
It was an honor to watch you be an inspiration to so many you encountered, whether in brief moments or as a long time friend. I deeply admired how you shared your views unapologetically, passionately. Yet, were so patient and kind while listening to others.
I can’t help but wonder if you knew early on why you were here. Your were dutiful in making sure you could help as many as you could when they crossed your path.
I hope it brings your soul happinees and joy to know the guidance you offered me has sent my life in a brighter direction, and it continues to resonate in my life, even today. It has helped me blossom into a better person. I will this cherish forever.
But that is not were you end.
You were also so kind. You paid attention to detail. You remembered stories. The little things. The parts that mattered.
You were charismatic, charming even.
You knew jokes and told them well. You genuinely enjoyed making people smile and laugh. I can still hear you singing from time to time.
You were always so welcoming and cared about ensuring everyone felt at home in your presence. A truly generous soul.
You had vision for the future. You were prophetic. After a year of you being gone I am still watching many of your predictions come true.
You were brilliant. You could talk in depth about so many concepts, and bring them together like a seamless melody.
And your musical talent should not go unspoken for. I still listen to your songs from time to time, escaping into the multi-layered beats crafted in your tracks. I miss you playing the piano.
You were truly gifted, a genius of your own kind. May your indigo soul rest in it’s violet flame and finally rest in peace.
I wish I’d met you sooner, but I am so grateful that in such short time you managed to squeeze in teaching me about the grand universality of it all, and how important it is to not loose sight of how fun and magical life can be.
…”We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when” ….
In the meantime, may you finally be free. In full flight.
Much love
️️
II:II
111
Altay’cığımız dünyamıza erken ve zamansız veda etti.Oysa amcası olarak onunla daha uzun ve güzel günler geçirecek,birlikte Marmaris’te tatil yapacaktık.Kısmet olmadı,anıları,hatıraları ve piyanosunun tuşlarından çıkan o muhteşem müziği ve besteleriyle yaşıyacağız artık.Kıymetli anne ve babası Sema’cığımıza,Cemal’ciğimize sabır ve başsağlığı dileklerimizi tekrarlıyoruz.İnanıyoruz ki, sevgili yeğenimiz cennet mekanında huzur ve ışıklar içinde uyuyor,melekler ona yoldaşlık ediyor.Ruhu şadolsun .Şeyda-Can Pulak
Bulent Pulak, amcan
Halandan hemen sonra seni de kaybetmek , Can’in dedigi gibi ailemizin en aci ve huzunku gunlerinden biri.
Seninle maalesef tanisamadik. Ne yazik!Birbirimizi cok sevicegimizi dusunuyorum.Ne de olsa Pulak’iz.
Sana bu uzun yolculugunda huzur ve sevgi diliyorum.
Seni cok seviyoruz.
Sevgili Altay,
Halandan hemen sonra seni de kaybetmek, Can’in dedigi gibi ailemizin eh aci ve huzunlu gunlerinden biri.
Seninle maalesf tanisamadik. Ne yazik !Tanissaydik birbirimizi cok sevecegimizi dusunuyorum.
Sana bu uzun sonsuz yolculugunda huzur ve sevgi diliyorum.
Seni cok seviyorum.
Bulent Pulak
I miss you today so much ❤️ I’m sorry I couldn’t help you more, I’m sorry I left you in a really bad way. You deserved more from me
Dear Altay,
It has been two years since your passing and your loving mom has told me so much about you. You presence in this world is no longer physical but your spirit still inspires. We are supporting your wonderful mom as much as we can. Keep watch over her with your beautiful heart and warm embraces.
Ann W.